I worry that United Church's 2SLGBTQIA+ apology is only a gesture

On Aug. 8, The United Church of Canada apologized to the 2S and LGBTQIA+ people of the church. On that day, the apology, decades in the making, was presented as part of a worship service.

There was a lot of anxiety around the apology, stemming mainly from the fact that no one had seen a final copy of the words that would be spoken. The only text that had been shared was a draft presented at a town hall almost six months ago. Many expressed problems with that draft at the time, saying the words seemed empty, as if the church had been pushed into this rather than doing it of their own volition.

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I was sitting in a pew at Calgary’s Knox United on the day of the apology, surrounded by colleagues and friends. My thoughts turned to the elders who laid the groundwork for the path to the apology and pushed the United Church to accept the queer community. Some of those elders were present, others were watching online, and others sadly were watching in spirit. In 1988, the church referred only to “lesbians and gays,” but queer identity has grown in nearly 40 years to be 2S and LGBTQIA+ people.

After the apology, we gathered to share our initial responses to what was said. I heard hope from the youth, sadness that elders who fought for this day were no longer here, anger over the length of time it has taken to get here and fear that nothing will change.

Since that day, I have had many more conversations that are both positive and negative. We offered a space where those who could not speak their feelings could write them on paper hearts. I have collected those hearts, and they are now in a rainbow-painted box. These hearts and all of these conversations have helped me deepen my own response to the apology.

In some ways, I wish the apology had not been presented at this General Council. More time was needed to discern the path forward after the apology. I wish there had been more chances for consultation. We had one town hall; we needed at least one more before the apology. I wish the words of the apology had been given to the 2S and LGBTQIA+ participants who met for two days prior to the opening of General Council 45 for their input, as doing so may have alleviated anxiety.

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In one conversation, I was asked, “Why was the apology given by two queer people? Shouldn’t it have been given by someone who was from the Community of Concern or at least someone straight? It gave the impression that we were apologizing to ourselves rather than the church as a whole apologizing to the queer community in the church.” I know that Rev. Michael Blair and Very Rev. Carmen Lansdowne were apologizing as the general secretary and then-moderator, rather than as queer members of the church, but this person has a point. Former members of the Community of Concern — a group that opposed the ordination of gays and lesbians in the church — were sitting in the pews during the apology service. It would have been more impactful if one of them had offered the apology or shared the delivery with Blair and Lansdowne.

The apology, a carefully crafted document, is much more intellectual than heartfelt. I worry that it will not move the church forward and will merely be a gesture of words rather than actions. I would like to see a stronger commitment toward becoming an Affirming denomination. I live in guarded hope that the apology will gain meaning and purpose within the church and move it along the Affirming path.

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Rev. Ruth Noble is the executive director of Affirm United/S’affirmer Ensemble.

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